Yes, I am BACK!!! While some of you may say "GREAT! He is back" and most of you might say "Oh god! not again", I still decided to write this post as I think with the exam time approaching Blitz Krieg, this might get your minds off studies for a while, if not cheer you up.
I would have liked the song "Glass Shatters" by the rock band "Disturbed" as my entrance theme, however it seems Bakchod baba has taken all the right to "GLASS" shatters. Someone needs to stop Bakchod baba with his bullying acts becoming a competition to even Questionnaire. After all, no one would like Caraniya to become a North Indian Hostel.
So...assignments are over for most or all of you and the small talks like "tera kitna hua" would be part of majority of conversations, atleast between the student segment of Caraniya. During my last three visits, I already noticed some of you talking about how they have not even started with their preparations, now either this is a genuine statement or it is an insurance for your results, as in case of any low marks or failures, there is always this "excuse cushion" to fall back on.
Moody Aamla is never short of the "excuse cushion" though; his repeated excuse about Mumbai Indians' loss in the IPL in the form of his Facebook status message surprised even a hardcore supporter like me. Mumbai Indians realy tested his array of excuses though by losing matches out of winning positions one after the other. Moody did not disappoint them, afterall, if it wasn’t excuses, he had the much famous quotes of his "GOD" which he put up in an attempt to justify the loss of Mumbai Indians. All said and done, even with all his alienated jokes and excuses, I did not expect him to stoop to the level of supporting Bangalore, come on Moody!! I thought you were different from your roomie.
Speaking of his roomie, Narad Muni, he is next in line for the nomination of the Kingfisher Fair Play Award as he gave each team a fair chance of performing by supporting them atleast once during the course of the entire tournament, afterall, why should just Kolkata be on the receiving end of things. However, his main support was to Kolkata and Bangalore, fortunately for him, Bangalore made it to the finals, otherwise the infamous line of Narad Muni was inevitable about how his heart is with Manchester United and the rest of the team he just supports for fun and does not care much about.
Support was given a new definition on the day of the final of IPL, when I realised that there was someone who supported Mumbai Indians more than Moody and I did. A/C was convinced by some people that Mumbai reached the finals and she apparently believed that, NOW...THAT IS WHAT I CALL SUPPORT!!
HOPE, something which binds the world together was what A/C exuberated. What else would you call it after Mumbai's achievement in the IPL to somehow beat everyone else and reign at the bottom of the table? (NO, I do not consider KKR here, with the way they played in the tournament, the battle was always for the second last spot in the table). Anyway bravo A/C, I am proud of you, you have beaten us all to become the most passionate supporter of Mumbai Indians.
Vidarbh Raina has surely learnt a thing or two from A/C as he showed similar optimism while betting in the favour of Bangalore winning the final, with a match loser like Robin Uthappa batting, Vidarbh either had the heart of a lion or the mind of an Ox, in either case, all I gotta tell him is that, Vidarbh...I know you miss your roommate Bhai Ji but doing what he would do is no way of filling in his absence.
While most of the people were rooting for Bangalore to win that day, Sexy Eyes came in the room and with his blissful eyes he looked upon all us mortals and enlightened us with his vision and told all the Bangalore supporters hoping for a win............. "So It Shall Be". Unfortunately for him, his powers have shown more variance than Mumbai Indian's performance in the IPL. He did have his moments though when Deccan Chargers lost a wicket and he jumped in joy, celebrating the loss of that wicket. Sexy Eyes' celebrations looked like a tribute to our ancestors (Monkeys). Now that is a prime example for you A/C about people disrespecting Darwin's Theory of Evolution. However, With his 3/4ths and t shirt on his pencil figure, he provided more entertainment than the match did.
That set for this one folks, I would have liked to write more about other people but as you all know, other than being the FAKE caraniya resident, I am also now an EX caraniya resident, so I can only write about things which I am able to see. So sorry to the folks whom I missed. This post was majorly a mixture of all the things I observed in the 3 days I visited Caraniya recently.
Hope this cheered you up and if not, atleast it got you to read something else apart from your text books. I don’t know if I will come back again, perhaps I will write again if I see and feel a need to do so.
So, Bye Folks, Best of Luck to everyone for their exams
I'll See You When I See You.
Adios Amigos
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Last Nail In the Coffin
Just when you thought its all over,the Fake Caraniya Resident decides to come back for one last round. Before I left, I thought it would be better if I put in this last post, and this thought of mine was encouraged when some of you recommended the same as well.
It was real fun to see everyone react to the revelation of my identity. All of you were kind enough to appreciate me and some of you genuinely admitted that they did not have an idea about who I was. There were a few whom I knew had their suspicion on me and it was fine, although a few revelations came to me as well after I revealed my identity.
Salsa Sauce, whom I gave kudos to for guessing it was me, decided to miss a rhythm or two to go way more than a step ahead of us. On the first day when people started talking about the blog, he said he knew who it was and was speculating at Moody Aamla(as informed to me by Moody) and was also basing his speculation on whom he gave his email ids to. However, now he says "AREY MUJHE TOH PEHLE DIN SE HI PATA THA".
Wow! I wonder if he knows about Area 51 and the Bermuda Triangle as well, as he knows everything since adam. Salsa Sauce was a little late to know about the fact that I revealed my identity, as even after the blog was published, he offered me if I need some information to help me write something on the blog. Well Salsa, if this blog was depended upon juicy and spicy information, there was a lot more I could have written about you. This blog was all about keeping it "OUT THERE" and talking about things which everyone knew and were comfortable with.
Bheem apparently did not feel much of comfort though when he opened the doors to the men's bathroom and had to see Ali Baba in all his glory, fortunately or unfortunately for Bheem, Ali Baba was sitting with his BACK to the door. Ali Baba should be glad that Bheem leaves tomorrow otherwise some ackward moments in the common areas were inevitable.
Bhai Ji's departure from Caraniya certainly was inevitable too and if he was smart enough to guess who I was from my first post, then I had a clear enough idea as well that his departure from Caraniya was only a matter of days. I would like to praise him for what its worth, as he was the original and the ONLY guy(apart from Chidambaram who knows me for more than a year now) to have guessed it was me FOR SURE and the information then went to "others", well done Bhai Ji, perhaps you are not as stupid as you are percieved by others. Although I have little idea about what causes him to leave Caraniya, I am sure there is more to it than meets the eye but I wish him all the best to prove himself in life. By the way, Bhai Ji is going to the house in which I was suppose to shift 3 weeks back but did not, DAANE DAANE PE LIKHA HOTA HAI KHAANE WAALE KA NAAM.
Speaking of departures, tonight is my last night at Caraniya and I hope it goes well, although I hope I meet everyone before I leave tomorrow, especially M.R.P. who certainly seems to be very busy nowdays. I hope he is still not looking for the "I.P. Address" of the Fake Caraniya Resident, as a few of you said you will get him to find me out. If you ever get time M.R.P, I would certainly like to know what software gives you access to such discreet information. I am a tech freak too, although I hope its not one of those "special deals" of yours which we still await.
What I still await is also the face to face reaction from Vanilla Icecream, he seems to open up in online mode only as he was expressionless and commentless when he was having dinner with us last night. Well atleast this shows that Vanilla Icecream is pretty much like me in these things as even I decide to only open up online, eh?
A/C decided to open up in the online mode too, infact she made me open up the dictionary to understand what she means. This wasnt the first time she had me looking up words on dictionary though, as the few weeks back,I, along with a few others were coming back from 7/11 at night and A/C was sitting outside with her laptop all alone, Moody Aamla dared to ask her what she was doing and the reply was "SERENITY". Guess the high number of your eyes at such a young age is finally justified. Elegant choice of words you have though, good job!!
Mitti's answers to our problems are still anything but justified. Apparently for getting a print out of a pdf file and a photo file, she needs two different "softwares". Sometimes I wonder if she doesnt know anything herself or she thinks we are too stupid. In either case, it would take someone with a lot of time and patience to sit and argue with her.
Moody Aamla was trying his level best to show yesterday that he has it in him to be the next Fake Caraniya Resident as he and Narad Muni thought about giving it(continuing the blog) a try. He, with his cheesy one liners came right one after the other while on our way to 7/11. You defenitely have loads of talent in you to become a good writter Moody and perhaps even an advertising copywritter as well, although it would take you to sacrifice some of your David Dhawan Jokes.
Atleast the Three Musketeers thought Moody Aamla was the Fake Caraniya Resident and apparently 100 Miles was disappointed that I did not write about his cooking. Well, all I gotta say is that if M.B.A. does not work out for you, cookery is a definite option for you my friend, afterall that's the hot course for most P.R. holders and given the current employment situation in India(if it could have gotten any worse), you can surely give P.R. a thought, if nothing else, Aashiana would love to take you under his wings.
That set for this last one guys, I wrote this last post because some of you requested me for more and I thought before going, I should write a last one AFTER revealing myself and one more reason was that after I revealed myself, the reactions I got, combined with some of the interesting things that happened since yesterday urged me to write this post.
Before I leave, I just want to answer those who were of the opinion that I should have continued even after I left without revealing my identity, I just wanna say that first of all I am not a coward that I would make comments about people since I am out of Caraniya and no one can trace me. The reason to be anonymous for the first few posts was to strike an interesting debate about this suspense, I knew all along, before deciding to leave Cariniya that I WILL reveal my identity pretty soon. The second and the most important reason for me not continuing this is because I believe in something which one of my favorite wrestling characters said:-
"ARRIVE.......RAISE HELL.............LEAVE!!"
It was real fun to see everyone react to the revelation of my identity. All of you were kind enough to appreciate me and some of you genuinely admitted that they did not have an idea about who I was. There were a few whom I knew had their suspicion on me and it was fine, although a few revelations came to me as well after I revealed my identity.
Salsa Sauce, whom I gave kudos to for guessing it was me, decided to miss a rhythm or two to go way more than a step ahead of us. On the first day when people started talking about the blog, he said he knew who it was and was speculating at Moody Aamla(as informed to me by Moody) and was also basing his speculation on whom he gave his email ids to. However, now he says "AREY MUJHE TOH PEHLE DIN SE HI PATA THA".
Wow! I wonder if he knows about Area 51 and the Bermuda Triangle as well, as he knows everything since adam. Salsa Sauce was a little late to know about the fact that I revealed my identity, as even after the blog was published, he offered me if I need some information to help me write something on the blog. Well Salsa, if this blog was depended upon juicy and spicy information, there was a lot more I could have written about you. This blog was all about keeping it "OUT THERE" and talking about things which everyone knew and were comfortable with.
Bheem apparently did not feel much of comfort though when he opened the doors to the men's bathroom and had to see Ali Baba in all his glory, fortunately or unfortunately for Bheem, Ali Baba was sitting with his BACK to the door. Ali Baba should be glad that Bheem leaves tomorrow otherwise some ackward moments in the common areas were inevitable.
Bhai Ji's departure from Caraniya certainly was inevitable too and if he was smart enough to guess who I was from my first post, then I had a clear enough idea as well that his departure from Caraniya was only a matter of days. I would like to praise him for what its worth, as he was the original and the ONLY guy(apart from Chidambaram who knows me for more than a year now) to have guessed it was me FOR SURE and the information then went to "others", well done Bhai Ji, perhaps you are not as stupid as you are percieved by others. Although I have little idea about what causes him to leave Caraniya, I am sure there is more to it than meets the eye but I wish him all the best to prove himself in life. By the way, Bhai Ji is going to the house in which I was suppose to shift 3 weeks back but did not, DAANE DAANE PE LIKHA HOTA HAI KHAANE WAALE KA NAAM.
Speaking of departures, tonight is my last night at Caraniya and I hope it goes well, although I hope I meet everyone before I leave tomorrow, especially M.R.P. who certainly seems to be very busy nowdays. I hope he is still not looking for the "I.P. Address" of the Fake Caraniya Resident, as a few of you said you will get him to find me out. If you ever get time M.R.P, I would certainly like to know what software gives you access to such discreet information. I am a tech freak too, although I hope its not one of those "special deals" of yours which we still await.
What I still await is also the face to face reaction from Vanilla Icecream, he seems to open up in online mode only as he was expressionless and commentless when he was having dinner with us last night. Well atleast this shows that Vanilla Icecream is pretty much like me in these things as even I decide to only open up online, eh?
A/C decided to open up in the online mode too, infact she made me open up the dictionary to understand what she means. This wasnt the first time she had me looking up words on dictionary though, as the few weeks back,I, along with a few others were coming back from 7/11 at night and A/C was sitting outside with her laptop all alone, Moody Aamla dared to ask her what she was doing and the reply was "SERENITY". Guess the high number of your eyes at such a young age is finally justified. Elegant choice of words you have though, good job!!
Mitti's answers to our problems are still anything but justified. Apparently for getting a print out of a pdf file and a photo file, she needs two different "softwares". Sometimes I wonder if she doesnt know anything herself or she thinks we are too stupid. In either case, it would take someone with a lot of time and patience to sit and argue with her.
Moody Aamla was trying his level best to show yesterday that he has it in him to be the next Fake Caraniya Resident as he and Narad Muni thought about giving it(continuing the blog) a try. He, with his cheesy one liners came right one after the other while on our way to 7/11. You defenitely have loads of talent in you to become a good writter Moody and perhaps even an advertising copywritter as well, although it would take you to sacrifice some of your David Dhawan Jokes.
Atleast the Three Musketeers thought Moody Aamla was the Fake Caraniya Resident and apparently 100 Miles was disappointed that I did not write about his cooking. Well, all I gotta say is that if M.B.A. does not work out for you, cookery is a definite option for you my friend, afterall that's the hot course for most P.R. holders and given the current employment situation in India(if it could have gotten any worse), you can surely give P.R. a thought, if nothing else, Aashiana would love to take you under his wings.
That set for this last one guys, I wrote this last post because some of you requested me for more and I thought before going, I should write a last one AFTER revealing myself and one more reason was that after I revealed myself, the reactions I got, combined with some of the interesting things that happened since yesterday urged me to write this post.
Before I leave, I just want to answer those who were of the opinion that I should have continued even after I left without revealing my identity, I just wanna say that first of all I am not a coward that I would make comments about people since I am out of Caraniya and no one can trace me. The reason to be anonymous for the first few posts was to strike an interesting debate about this suspense, I knew all along, before deciding to leave Cariniya that I WILL reveal my identity pretty soon. The second and the most important reason for me not continuing this is because I believe in something which one of my favorite wrestling characters said:-
"ARRIVE.......RAISE HELL.............LEAVE!!"
Monday, May 4, 2009
It Ends Tonight
After conceding 5 byes (as per Vanilla Icecream) its time for me to aim for a yorker with me now bowling at the end. All good things come to an end. So, I am taking the liberty of assuming that this blog was good as well and hence the time to end it has also come.
As I said the last time about how pleasant a sight it was to watch all people talking about something common TOGETHER, my biggest achievement came yesterday. Something even the Right Kniders failed to do. Silent Killer was finally looking excited when he talked about the possibilities about the identity of Fake Caraniya Resident (FCR) with Aashiana and Laathi Charge. May be this blog was worth more than what I thought it would be.
Aashiana had his list of suspects as well and while most of his suspects were understandable, his two cents about Bheem being FCR was just a little over the top. Either its a wild guess based on lack of interaction with Bheem or seems like the cold shower last week is still showing its effects on Aashiana.
The Blog had an effect or two of its own as well or perhaps it is my imagination wandering around but I felt some people being careful about what they do or say around others as they never know if that would become the highlight of the next post. Especially since I recieved no objection from anyone about not mentioning them on the blog, either through comments or email.
Speaking of Email, someone needs to give Chidambaram a heads up about whats going on in this world because as per his understanding anyone who has an account at gmail can be FCR as I use a gmail account too. I suggest he should increase his fixed asset of knowledge or else the profits wont increase.
The suspense of Bhai Ji's absense from Cariniya is surely increasing, I am assuming that he is been doing some deep thinking about why did he like Salman in the first place, well..that should keep him busy for a while, atleast till the release of yet another atroscious attempt by Salman which he this time has decided to call Veer, which I think is because only Veer (Brave) people like Bhai Ji would have the guts to go watch the movie.
Someone who surely does not lack guts is Richie Rich, having already got an extension for his task, he is not even half way through but surely takes out time to play pool, with his own self though, following the trend of him wanting to do everything alone.
Speaking of pool, Moody Aamla was giving suggestions to Zayed Khan about his shots on the pool table yesterday and perhaps Zayed was in a generous mood as he was listening to Moody too, however after a while when Moody realised he is suggesting more wrong than right, he decided to play it safe like he always does and let Zayed play his game.
There was certainly a big game last night for Southbank with his team Deccan Chargers playing against Chennai. The last time Deccan won, his agression mixed with his color resemblance to the carribean island reminded me of curtley ambrose, need to work on getting those lips bigger though.
Bakchod Baba is certainly working on his looks nowdays, looking fresh and with a glow on his face. Afterall, the Vietnam war is not yet over and with the Middle East invasion on the cards, Bakchod baba has got to be at his best. He might also be preparing for a call from Shane Warne for a place in the Rajasthan Royals side, I mean at a time when Ravindra Jadeja can get a nod for the Indian side ahead of guys like Dinesh Karthik and Abhishek Nayar, Bakchod Baba can surely be optimistic for a miracle.
While we are on the topic of the IPL, Salsa Sauce (for whom I have a new found respect, the reasons for which I shall not discuss here) has decided to change his team preference from the Right Kniders to the Mumbai Indians and was cheering "GO MUMBAI" during Mumbai's match, no wonder Mumbai was thrashed in that very game, I think he is better off making Salsa Sauce as cheerleading surely does not seem to be his forte.
Narad Muni would have defenitely loved watching Mumbai's defeat especially since it was coming against a team he apparently "supports", i.e. the Bangalore Royal Challengers. I hope that would have cheered him up a little bit because from what I heard, he was quite upset about the comments I had for him in my second post. However, since he did not mention any objection from his side to me directly, I am certainly not leaving the opportunity to have a crack at him. Narad Muni was questioning the support of people towards their respective IPL teams, asking how can people get so attached to a team in one year(IPL started last year), "there is no tradition, no history" he said. Now let me answer that in two parts:-
1. People are not attached to the teams or shall I say franchisees, they are attached to their respective lands, for e.g. Mumbai, Hyderabad etc. (exclude Bakchod Baba though, he just thinks supporting Shane Warne's team would earn him an opportunity to play for the Royals one day) There is no bigger attachment to a person than the attachment with his land, where you grew up,where you spent your life.
2. Now, I wonder what is his connection to his "favorite team" Manchester United. I am sure a trip to Manchester when he was 10 year old is anything more than a lame excuse. What is his traditional or historial connection with Manchester United and even if I assume for a moment if his short trip to Manchester is a reason enough then I would say he should support Manchester City with the same passion as he supports the United.
Now...lets talk about the end of this blog. The reasons for which I end this blog are many but primarily because I dont want to be Ekta Kapoor and drag it till people beg me to stop. However, since I am ending this blog, the question of my identity also needs to be answered.
It is obvious that I have decided to reveal my identity since I am ending this blog now. So the question is...Who Am I?
Many people had their suspect lists and some people were SURE about who I am. The primary suspects who most of you thought were:-
1.Moody Aamla: Most of you thought I am Moody Aamla, everyone's first choice was him.
2.Questionnaire: Then there were quiet a few people, who also thought it could be the Questionnaire.
3.Bakchod Baba: Some people also thought it could be Bakchod Baba since he is the funniest and jolliest of the lot.
Well...........Tumne Jo Dekha Hai..Socha Hai, Samjha Hai, Jaana Hai,WOH MAIN NAHIN!!
Let me first give u a tough hint:-
"RNFYOMOOOBRNMRTE"
Scroll down if you havent got it yet
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Let me give you an easier hint now:-
I have made fun of myself as well(which was more than obvious) and some of you hardly know me as well.
I am sure you must have guessed it by now but if you still havent then scroll down
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Now let me give you the easiest hint I could think of:-
I am a hardcore MUMBAI INDIANS SUPPORTER!!!
Well, that should do it I guess, YES I am the Jersey Man a.k.a. Assignment Maestro(by a few people, which I still cant figure out why) and NOW..... a.k.a. Fake Cariniya Resident
The answer to the first hint is through the Julius Caesar Box(I know most of you wont know about it,thats why it was the toughest hint) and applying that theory, the answer looks like this:-
R N F Y
O M O O
O B R N
M R T E
So,if you read it down from "R", you get...............ROOM NMBR FORTY ONE
So, I, Jay Adhikari was the Fake Caraniya Resident. Kudos to Salsa Sauce for guessing it was me, and to A/C as well for being the one who had me on her suspect list atleast. Sorry Chidambaram but y0ur reason for doubting me was way too vague so no kudos for you. I dont know if there was anyone else also who knew or doubted it was me but as far as I know these two were the only people.
I hope I provided some fun to all of you. However I also need to give a few due credits here:-
1. The idea of doing something like this belongs to Moody Aamla, he first came up with it.
2. My partner in crime was SouthBank, who along with Moody Aamla knew it was me all along.
3. And for those who were lending a shoulder to the upset Narad Muni, he was also involved with me, knowing everything about it from day one, now I wonder if anyone would care when he is upset the next time.
Also since Southbank had some problem with his digestive system, Questionnaire and Bakchod Baba came to know about me after my initial blog
However, the writting and creative department belonged completely to me (Apart from the name of Salsa Sauce, as my idea was to keep Salsa King but Questionnaire after knowing my identity suggested Salsa Sauce which sounded better) and the timing of each post and blah blah blah blah was all done by me. I take full responsibility if consciously or unconsciously I have hurt anyone. I had a short stay at Caraniya and I thought it would bring some spice and masala to do something like this. As I mentioned before my intention was not to hurt anyone, it was all in good fun and I assume people have taken it in the right spirit.
So, that set guys, the FAKE CARANIYA RESIDENT is over.
Thanks to all those who commented and to those who followed and liked my efforts.
Before I sign off, to clear everyone's confusion, here are a list of all the names I gave to people refering to their actual names:-
M.R.P - Lawrence
A/C - Ankita Chokhani
SouthBank - Vikas (Mannaru)
Bakchod Baba - Aviral
Questionnaire - Sunny
Silent Killer - Shukla Ji
Sexy Eyes - Jay Shah
Noorani Chehra - Hiren (better known as Veeru)
100 Miles - Somil (better known as Gabbar)
Bhai Ji - Shripal
Moody Aamla - Karan
Narad Muni - Swagatam
Jersey Man - Jay Adhikari (ME)
Aashiana - Piyush
Laathi Charge - Raathi
Salsa Sauce - Mohit
Vanilla Icecream- Nikhil
Vidarbh Raina - Aayush
Zayed Khan - Rahul
Bheem - Vikas (Body Builder, my roommate)
Chidambaram - Siddharth Tanwani(the long hair fellow)
Richie Rich - Hemanth
So, Adios Amigos, I'll see you..........When I see you. Buh-Bye!!
As I said the last time about how pleasant a sight it was to watch all people talking about something common TOGETHER, my biggest achievement came yesterday. Something even the Right Kniders failed to do. Silent Killer was finally looking excited when he talked about the possibilities about the identity of Fake Caraniya Resident (FCR) with Aashiana and Laathi Charge. May be this blog was worth more than what I thought it would be.
Aashiana had his list of suspects as well and while most of his suspects were understandable, his two cents about Bheem being FCR was just a little over the top. Either its a wild guess based on lack of interaction with Bheem or seems like the cold shower last week is still showing its effects on Aashiana.
The Blog had an effect or two of its own as well or perhaps it is my imagination wandering around but I felt some people being careful about what they do or say around others as they never know if that would become the highlight of the next post. Especially since I recieved no objection from anyone about not mentioning them on the blog, either through comments or email.
Speaking of Email, someone needs to give Chidambaram a heads up about whats going on in this world because as per his understanding anyone who has an account at gmail can be FCR as I use a gmail account too. I suggest he should increase his fixed asset of knowledge or else the profits wont increase.
The suspense of Bhai Ji's absense from Cariniya is surely increasing, I am assuming that he is been doing some deep thinking about why did he like Salman in the first place, well..that should keep him busy for a while, atleast till the release of yet another atroscious attempt by Salman which he this time has decided to call Veer, which I think is because only Veer (Brave) people like Bhai Ji would have the guts to go watch the movie.
Someone who surely does not lack guts is Richie Rich, having already got an extension for his task, he is not even half way through but surely takes out time to play pool, with his own self though, following the trend of him wanting to do everything alone.
Speaking of pool, Moody Aamla was giving suggestions to Zayed Khan about his shots on the pool table yesterday and perhaps Zayed was in a generous mood as he was listening to Moody too, however after a while when Moody realised he is suggesting more wrong than right, he decided to play it safe like he always does and let Zayed play his game.
There was certainly a big game last night for Southbank with his team Deccan Chargers playing against Chennai. The last time Deccan won, his agression mixed with his color resemblance to the carribean island reminded me of curtley ambrose, need to work on getting those lips bigger though.
Bakchod Baba is certainly working on his looks nowdays, looking fresh and with a glow on his face. Afterall, the Vietnam war is not yet over and with the Middle East invasion on the cards, Bakchod baba has got to be at his best. He might also be preparing for a call from Shane Warne for a place in the Rajasthan Royals side, I mean at a time when Ravindra Jadeja can get a nod for the Indian side ahead of guys like Dinesh Karthik and Abhishek Nayar, Bakchod Baba can surely be optimistic for a miracle.
While we are on the topic of the IPL, Salsa Sauce (for whom I have a new found respect, the reasons for which I shall not discuss here) has decided to change his team preference from the Right Kniders to the Mumbai Indians and was cheering "GO MUMBAI" during Mumbai's match, no wonder Mumbai was thrashed in that very game, I think he is better off making Salsa Sauce as cheerleading surely does not seem to be his forte.
Narad Muni would have defenitely loved watching Mumbai's defeat especially since it was coming against a team he apparently "supports", i.e. the Bangalore Royal Challengers. I hope that would have cheered him up a little bit because from what I heard, he was quite upset about the comments I had for him in my second post. However, since he did not mention any objection from his side to me directly, I am certainly not leaving the opportunity to have a crack at him. Narad Muni was questioning the support of people towards their respective IPL teams, asking how can people get so attached to a team in one year(IPL started last year), "there is no tradition, no history" he said. Now let me answer that in two parts:-
1. People are not attached to the teams or shall I say franchisees, they are attached to their respective lands, for e.g. Mumbai, Hyderabad etc. (exclude Bakchod Baba though, he just thinks supporting Shane Warne's team would earn him an opportunity to play for the Royals one day) There is no bigger attachment to a person than the attachment with his land, where you grew up,where you spent your life.
2. Now, I wonder what is his connection to his "favorite team" Manchester United. I am sure a trip to Manchester when he was 10 year old is anything more than a lame excuse. What is his traditional or historial connection with Manchester United and even if I assume for a moment if his short trip to Manchester is a reason enough then I would say he should support Manchester City with the same passion as he supports the United.
Now...lets talk about the end of this blog. The reasons for which I end this blog are many but primarily because I dont want to be Ekta Kapoor and drag it till people beg me to stop. However, since I am ending this blog, the question of my identity also needs to be answered.
It is obvious that I have decided to reveal my identity since I am ending this blog now. So the question is...Who Am I?
Many people had their suspect lists and some people were SURE about who I am. The primary suspects who most of you thought were:-
1.Moody Aamla: Most of you thought I am Moody Aamla, everyone's first choice was him.
2.Questionnaire: Then there were quiet a few people, who also thought it could be the Questionnaire.
3.Bakchod Baba: Some people also thought it could be Bakchod Baba since he is the funniest and jolliest of the lot.
Well...........Tumne Jo Dekha Hai..Socha Hai, Samjha Hai, Jaana Hai,WOH MAIN NAHIN!!
Let me first give u a tough hint:-
"RNFYOMOOOBRNMRTE"
Scroll down if you havent got it yet
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Let me give you an easier hint now:-
I have made fun of myself as well(which was more than obvious) and some of you hardly know me as well.
I am sure you must have guessed it by now but if you still havent then scroll down
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Now let me give you the easiest hint I could think of:-
I am a hardcore MUMBAI INDIANS SUPPORTER!!!
Well, that should do it I guess, YES I am the Jersey Man a.k.a. Assignment Maestro(by a few people, which I still cant figure out why) and NOW..... a.k.a. Fake Cariniya Resident
The answer to the first hint is through the Julius Caesar Box(I know most of you wont know about it,thats why it was the toughest hint) and applying that theory, the answer looks like this:-
R N F Y
O M O O
O B R N
M R T E
So,if you read it down from "R", you get...............ROOM NMBR FORTY ONE
So, I, Jay Adhikari was the Fake Caraniya Resident. Kudos to Salsa Sauce for guessing it was me, and to A/C as well for being the one who had me on her suspect list atleast. Sorry Chidambaram but y0ur reason for doubting me was way too vague so no kudos for you. I dont know if there was anyone else also who knew or doubted it was me but as far as I know these two were the only people.
I hope I provided some fun to all of you. However I also need to give a few due credits here:-
1. The idea of doing something like this belongs to Moody Aamla, he first came up with it.
2. My partner in crime was SouthBank, who along with Moody Aamla knew it was me all along.
3. And for those who were lending a shoulder to the upset Narad Muni, he was also involved with me, knowing everything about it from day one, now I wonder if anyone would care when he is upset the next time.
Also since Southbank had some problem with his digestive system, Questionnaire and Bakchod Baba came to know about me after my initial blog
However, the writting and creative department belonged completely to me (Apart from the name of Salsa Sauce, as my idea was to keep Salsa King but Questionnaire after knowing my identity suggested Salsa Sauce which sounded better) and the timing of each post and blah blah blah blah was all done by me. I take full responsibility if consciously or unconsciously I have hurt anyone. I had a short stay at Caraniya and I thought it would bring some spice and masala to do something like this. As I mentioned before my intention was not to hurt anyone, it was all in good fun and I assume people have taken it in the right spirit.
So, that set guys, the FAKE CARANIYA RESIDENT is over.
Thanks to all those who commented and to those who followed and liked my efforts.
Before I sign off, to clear everyone's confusion, here are a list of all the names I gave to people refering to their actual names:-
M.R.P - Lawrence
A/C - Ankita Chokhani
SouthBank - Vikas (Mannaru)
Bakchod Baba - Aviral
Questionnaire - Sunny
Silent Killer - Shukla Ji
Sexy Eyes - Jay Shah
Noorani Chehra - Hiren (better known as Veeru)
100 Miles - Somil (better known as Gabbar)
Bhai Ji - Shripal
Moody Aamla - Karan
Narad Muni - Swagatam
Jersey Man - Jay Adhikari (ME)
Aashiana - Piyush
Laathi Charge - Raathi
Salsa Sauce - Mohit
Vanilla Icecream- Nikhil
Vidarbh Raina - Aayush
Zayed Khan - Rahul
Bheem - Vikas (Body Builder, my roommate)
Chidambaram - Siddharth Tanwani(the long hair fellow)
Richie Rich - Hemanth
So, Adios Amigos, I'll see you..........When I see you. Buh-Bye!!
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Some Theories DO Pan Out
So the wise man's theory worked, finally I see some response,so I wasn't wrong, there were some silent observers just willing to have a look staying at the bay. Truth be told, it was a pleasant sight looking at all the people coming together and talking about something other than the IPL, all the people from all "groups" were talking and speculating on this one TOGETHER. I havent done much right in my life but this felt wonderful.
Now, I know all of you have already narrowed down on your "suspects", I have heard about theories and logics being discussed, time of email, IP addresses, so on and so forth. Now, let me get a few things straight:-
1st: I may be stupid but not that stupid,in the age of Microsoft Outlook and its supported programmes,its no rocket science to schedule the time of the email, so I may be out of the house or sleeping but the email would be sent at the time I wanted.
2nd: With Dynamic IP addresses and with wireless networks and shared passwords of those wifi networks, IP address is something you should defenitely not look for, well if you talk about MAC addresses(this is for those high tech GURUS),I, and even you know the way around it too, so it would be better not to bother with it.
3rd: And last but not the least, I would love to get "caught", my aim has already been achieved with most of you talking about this blog and speculating and the fact that most of you are also enjoying it too. Now for those who do get offended, if you do identify yourself and think its getting "personal" just comment to the blog(if you cant do that then just email me at fakecaraniya@gmail.com) and tell me to stop talking about you, I wont do it,as I said before,this is only for fun and my intention is not to hurt anyone.
Now enough of formal stuff,lets talk about something else. Vanilla Icecream commented and asked where was I till now, well my friend, I have been around always, this just felt like the right time to do something like this, things just happen you know. Just like the way, your great hand-eye co-ordination happened on the pool table, although I wonder if the beer had anything to do with it,eh?
Salsa Sauce already knows who I am, well I am guessing he should, after all he is always one "(salsa) step" ahead of us.
People also wonder how I get so much of time to do this, its simple folks, the same way you got all the time to discuss about this blog. To those special people who want me to do their assignments if I have so much of time, I have got two words for you...."JERSEY MAN", and if you do pay him for doing your assignment, kindly take my suggestion, gift another jersey to that fella, after all variety is the spice of life., if not for him, atleast for my eyes.
Oh by the way, in case I am not upto the mark with this post, do forgive me as my eyes had to bear the brunt of seeing the Eye Rapist come out of the bathroom at past midnight with her hair all open, that is enough to creep the creativity out of anyone, let alone a mortal like me.
Unfortunately, I have a very bad memory and I am not sure but I think I have hired Noorani Chehra as my advertising manager, how else would you explain him distributing my blog addresses to people who haven't got it yet. Good work N.C., take this as your internship offer, now what more could you ask from your trip to Melbourne, you get a Deakin degree in 1 semester,paying less than half of what others pay and now an internship as well. Way to go dude!!
Bakchod baba was busy defending Moody Aamla when everyone was busy taunting him and speculating him, well good for Bakchod baba,his defence is strong, now he needs to work on his attack, after all T20 ka zamana hai and its all about attack,aint it?
One person I dont see much of nowdays is Bhai Ji, I wonder if he has already started working on his next task and this time try to get full marks since the grace out of the gracefull has already been achieved. Although I do have news that Bhai Ji is doing his task with Jersey Man, so may be he is too busy playing cricket with his room mate Vidarbh Raina, who by the way seems so innocent that sometimes I wonder what made him come to the Devil's Land(Caraniya!!) Perhaps he is here because of Zayed Khan, after all he follows him in his quest to support the Daredevils aur waise bhi Vidarbh...KISKA HAI YEH TUMKO INTEZAAR...WOH HAI NA!!!
Southbank was very excited about the blog and was jumping around places discussing with everyone about it. He might wanna control that though because I think the last time he jumped, he went to the sun, how else do you explain the "south" Asian Paints on him. By the way, looking at his decreased brightness(if it could have decreased any further), I wonder if in his time out from facebook he went to the sun again.
Questionnaire and Bheem were drinking last night and all I could think about was the afternaths, thankfuly Questionnaire was busy playing pool and could not get a chance to start with his survey of "WHY" questions and Bheem was relatively quiet. While Bheem may be the eye candy he is, I cannot believe it when people laugh at his jokes, my 5 year old nephew cracks better jokes than he does and him shouting at the top of his voice with his jokes, which nowdays I notice is only laughed at by him. Bheem is a perfect example of the quote which says "Dont Judge a Book by its Cover".
That set for this time folks, I am sorry if this one was not fun enough,as I said Eye Rapist in her "chandi" look scared the bejesus out of me.
The other reason is obviously because with some people being hurt, I have decided to be a little careful. This is just for fun and would remain that way. HOWEVER......If by the next blog I do not get any objection from anyone, I WILL take that as a N.O.C. and go ahead with my jokes on them, so if anyone has any problem and do not want me to talk about them,PLEASE mention now!
Hope you "catch" me soon or otherwise...I'l see you when I see you. Take care till then.
Now, I know all of you have already narrowed down on your "suspects", I have heard about theories and logics being discussed, time of email, IP addresses, so on and so forth. Now, let me get a few things straight:-
1st: I may be stupid but not that stupid,in the age of Microsoft Outlook and its supported programmes,its no rocket science to schedule the time of the email, so I may be out of the house or sleeping but the email would be sent at the time I wanted.
2nd: With Dynamic IP addresses and with wireless networks and shared passwords of those wifi networks, IP address is something you should defenitely not look for, well if you talk about MAC addresses(this is for those high tech GURUS),I, and even you know the way around it too, so it would be better not to bother with it.
3rd: And last but not the least, I would love to get "caught", my aim has already been achieved with most of you talking about this blog and speculating and the fact that most of you are also enjoying it too. Now for those who do get offended, if you do identify yourself and think its getting "personal" just comment to the blog(if you cant do that then just email me at fakecaraniya@gmail.com) and tell me to stop talking about you, I wont do it,as I said before,this is only for fun and my intention is not to hurt anyone.
Now enough of formal stuff,lets talk about something else. Vanilla Icecream commented and asked where was I till now, well my friend, I have been around always, this just felt like the right time to do something like this, things just happen you know. Just like the way, your great hand-eye co-ordination happened on the pool table, although I wonder if the beer had anything to do with it,eh?
Salsa Sauce already knows who I am, well I am guessing he should, after all he is always one "(salsa) step" ahead of us.
People also wonder how I get so much of time to do this, its simple folks, the same way you got all the time to discuss about this blog. To those special people who want me to do their assignments if I have so much of time, I have got two words for you...."JERSEY MAN", and if you do pay him for doing your assignment, kindly take my suggestion, gift another jersey to that fella, after all variety is the spice of life., if not for him, atleast for my eyes.
Oh by the way, in case I am not upto the mark with this post, do forgive me as my eyes had to bear the brunt of seeing the Eye Rapist come out of the bathroom at past midnight with her hair all open, that is enough to creep the creativity out of anyone, let alone a mortal like me.
Unfortunately, I have a very bad memory and I am not sure but I think I have hired Noorani Chehra as my advertising manager, how else would you explain him distributing my blog addresses to people who haven't got it yet. Good work N.C., take this as your internship offer, now what more could you ask from your trip to Melbourne, you get a Deakin degree in 1 semester,paying less than half of what others pay and now an internship as well. Way to go dude!!
Bakchod baba was busy defending Moody Aamla when everyone was busy taunting him and speculating him, well good for Bakchod baba,his defence is strong, now he needs to work on his attack, after all T20 ka zamana hai and its all about attack,aint it?
One person I dont see much of nowdays is Bhai Ji, I wonder if he has already started working on his next task and this time try to get full marks since the grace out of the gracefull has already been achieved. Although I do have news that Bhai Ji is doing his task with Jersey Man, so may be he is too busy playing cricket with his room mate Vidarbh Raina, who by the way seems so innocent that sometimes I wonder what made him come to the Devil's Land(Caraniya!!) Perhaps he is here because of Zayed Khan, after all he follows him in his quest to support the Daredevils aur waise bhi Vidarbh...KISKA HAI YEH TUMKO INTEZAAR...WOH HAI NA!!!
Southbank was very excited about the blog and was jumping around places discussing with everyone about it. He might wanna control that though because I think the last time he jumped, he went to the sun, how else do you explain the "south" Asian Paints on him. By the way, looking at his decreased brightness(if it could have decreased any further), I wonder if in his time out from facebook he went to the sun again.
Questionnaire and Bheem were drinking last night and all I could think about was the afternaths, thankfuly Questionnaire was busy playing pool and could not get a chance to start with his survey of "WHY" questions and Bheem was relatively quiet. While Bheem may be the eye candy he is, I cannot believe it when people laugh at his jokes, my 5 year old nephew cracks better jokes than he does and him shouting at the top of his voice with his jokes, which nowdays I notice is only laughed at by him. Bheem is a perfect example of the quote which says "Dont Judge a Book by its Cover".
That set for this time folks, I am sorry if this one was not fun enough,as I said Eye Rapist in her "chandi" look scared the bejesus out of me.
The other reason is obviously because with some people being hurt, I have decided to be a little careful. This is just for fun and would remain that way. HOWEVER......If by the next blog I do not get any objection from anyone, I WILL take that as a N.O.C. and go ahead with my jokes on them, so if anyone has any problem and do not want me to talk about them,PLEASE mention now!
Hope you "catch" me soon or otherwise...I'l see you when I see you. Take care till then.
The Rule Of Three
A wise man once told me that if you do something and it fails, try it again, if you fail again,then try one last time and if you fail AGAIN,then move on.
So, since the first entry of the blog failed with no one really acknowleding it,going by the wise man's theory,I still have two more attempts. So, in other words, this could be my second last attempt.
I wouldn't say I was surprised to see this fail, however I was defenitely surprised to see Moody Aamla not getting excited about this. After all, he was most excited with FAKE IPL PLAYER. May be his room partner Narad Muni is keeping him busy with all his good "deeds".
Speaking of these two, news is that they have now taken some food catering service for their dinner, well, not much has changed though, they are still eating food cooked by others, the only difference is, this time they are paying for it.
Jersey Man was also surprisingly not excited about this blog but after I think about it, he spends half his day sleeping and the other half he either smokes or gives people advice on how they should do their assignment, I am sure he must be expecting an interview call from Deakin for the post of an assittant professor anytime now. It surprises me how people can just believe stuff for which they have not had any proof of, Jersey Man has not had any marks till now but people think he is "good" but who can blame them,eh? Narad Muni has been singing praises about him and everyone just followed him about his remark on the Jersey Man.
Caraniya was comparatively very quiet yesterday night, even Aashiana and Laathi Charge were not at their usual best in talking at the top of their voices. Although I really think these guys are much better, atleast they enjoy in a room and do not make loud noises in the common areas.
Talking about common areas, if you ever wonder where the trash from all homes in Australia is disposed, then all you have to do is, come to the happy go lucky kitchen of Caraniya, which is a "Haven for diseases" as quoted by the Foreign maal of Caraniya, when he was opening his heart to the Eye Rapist about how the "desis" decorate the kitchen and forget to put off the decoration when christmas is over.
You might wonder why would I call the kitchen "Happy go Lucky", this is because if you are cooking in the kitchen and strike a conversation with some other resident about food, no matter how god awfull your food looks, you WILL get a compliment, offer them the food, they would say "no thanks" but fake compliments does not cost a thing,right?
But what I dont understand WHY do you want to compliment someone when you dont really like it,WHY? WHY do people ask others during their sickness, "are you feeling better?" when there is nothing they can do about it,WHY? WOA!! Am, I talking too much like a certain someone? With so many WHY and "?", I think I might be spending a little too much time listening to the Questionnaire talk to others and ask them "WHY?"
Talking about spending too much time, Salsa Sauce is spending a little too much time on his fitness, he is either teaching how to make Salsa Sauce at Deakin or building up his stamina to make Salsa Sauce at the gym. May be, he is trying to get his frustrations out with his team getting beaten up mercilessly in the IPL or better yet, may be Salsa Sauce is doing all this training to be selcted for the Right Kniders, perhaps there is more than one wanna be cricketer in IPL with Bakchod Baba being the other.
So, that set for my possible second last attempt folks. I doubt if this would be a success, may be there are silent observers who choose not to comment but in either case, for the few who might be enjoying "just reading", I will write one last blog after this.
Adios Amigos!!
So, since the first entry of the blog failed with no one really acknowleding it,going by the wise man's theory,I still have two more attempts. So, in other words, this could be my second last attempt.
I wouldn't say I was surprised to see this fail, however I was defenitely surprised to see Moody Aamla not getting excited about this. After all, he was most excited with FAKE IPL PLAYER. May be his room partner Narad Muni is keeping him busy with all his good "deeds".
Speaking of these two, news is that they have now taken some food catering service for their dinner, well, not much has changed though, they are still eating food cooked by others, the only difference is, this time they are paying for it.
Jersey Man was also surprisingly not excited about this blog but after I think about it, he spends half his day sleeping and the other half he either smokes or gives people advice on how they should do their assignment, I am sure he must be expecting an interview call from Deakin for the post of an assittant professor anytime now. It surprises me how people can just believe stuff for which they have not had any proof of, Jersey Man has not had any marks till now but people think he is "good" but who can blame them,eh? Narad Muni has been singing praises about him and everyone just followed him about his remark on the Jersey Man.
Caraniya was comparatively very quiet yesterday night, even Aashiana and Laathi Charge were not at their usual best in talking at the top of their voices. Although I really think these guys are much better, atleast they enjoy in a room and do not make loud noises in the common areas.
Talking about common areas, if you ever wonder where the trash from all homes in Australia is disposed, then all you have to do is, come to the happy go lucky kitchen of Caraniya, which is a "Haven for diseases" as quoted by the Foreign maal of Caraniya, when he was opening his heart to the Eye Rapist about how the "desis" decorate the kitchen and forget to put off the decoration when christmas is over.
You might wonder why would I call the kitchen "Happy go Lucky", this is because if you are cooking in the kitchen and strike a conversation with some other resident about food, no matter how god awfull your food looks, you WILL get a compliment, offer them the food, they would say "no thanks" but fake compliments does not cost a thing,right?
But what I dont understand WHY do you want to compliment someone when you dont really like it,WHY? WHY do people ask others during their sickness, "are you feeling better?" when there is nothing they can do about it,WHY? WOA!! Am, I talking too much like a certain someone? With so many WHY and "?", I think I might be spending a little too much time listening to the Questionnaire talk to others and ask them "WHY?"
Talking about spending too much time, Salsa Sauce is spending a little too much time on his fitness, he is either teaching how to make Salsa Sauce at Deakin or building up his stamina to make Salsa Sauce at the gym. May be, he is trying to get his frustrations out with his team getting beaten up mercilessly in the IPL or better yet, may be Salsa Sauce is doing all this training to be selcted for the Right Kniders, perhaps there is more than one wanna be cricketer in IPL with Bakchod Baba being the other.
So, that set for my possible second last attempt folks. I doubt if this would be a success, may be there are silent observers who choose not to comment but in either case, for the few who might be enjoying "just reading", I will write one last blog after this.
Adios Amigos!!
Friday, May 1, 2009
Let the Funs Begins
Some would argue about the grammer of the title of this blog, however, we do know that Caraniya is filled with people with ultra unique grammar skills so we are trying to keep up with it.
So.....First things first, Yes! This is indeed a copy or cheap imitation(if you wanna call it that) of the FAKE IPL PLAYER blog. This is dedicated to our special "home" Caraniya. Where the owner has been able to get people from all walks of life.
This blog is just to have some fun, nothing else!! People who do take this personal should not read any further and basically not follow the blog and people who do get offended AND continue to read...well...........I DONT GIVE A DAMN THEN!! (No but seriously, this is STRICTLY for fun and nothing else, so please see it in the right way)
So, we have one morning staff and one night staff at Caraniya and I am sure our "MBA" students have a thing or two to learn from the owners about hiring, or shall I say "HRM". We have Mitti as our morning staff, who has the most atroscious answers to any and all of our problems, how else do you explain the internet getting slower because "people are using it". What was the purpose of internet again?
Next we have eye rapist as our night staff. She comes, she sees and....she rapes!! I still cannot understand if she does not want to talk or she cannot talk. In either case, her eyes tells the story, like they say "AANKHEIN BHIIIII.......HOTI HAI DIL KI ZABAAN".
So.....lets talk about our family members in Caraniya. By the way, before I start, Let me run a commercial which is sponsored by M.R.P. (Minimum Retail Price). If you are about to go for shopping clothes,groceries,gadgets then hold on to your horses and contact M.R.P., he gets you the best of prices,no matter what price you currently get,M.R.P. WILL BEAT IT! So get on phone and call 1-800-MRP, thats 1-800-MRP or come directly to room "1+23+32+4-45"
So, back to our family...as we all know, we have many Deakin students as well as students from Swinburne. Talking about universities, did any one of you have any idea that getting admission at Deakin is "VERY DIFFICULT" , atleast Air Cooler (A/C) certainly thinks so, and I was living in my own world thinking that we have geniuses from India at Deakin who cannot even work their way around the website of the university, well give them facebook, SURE!! they can find their way around but for the university website, they need to ask the professor 100s of question before "settling in the Australian education system".
While I am on the topic of facebook, GUESS WHOS BACK, BACK AGAIN, BLACKYS BACK, TELL A FRIEND!! GUESS WHO'S BACK, GUESS WHOS BACK, GUESS WHOS BACK.......
Southbank is finaly backk to facebook, so much for all his goodbyes to "everyone". Apparently he is getting back to a lot of things lately and smoking is one of it. We wonder if his time to go back to India is coming soon.
Bakchod baba is surely going back to India soon, I wonder if he would be in time for the selection of IPL 3. We will all miss him for sure. Most of all he would be missed by the Questionnaire. (More about him later)
So, lets talk about others now. The experiment on silent killer flopped as we failed to get him excited even after his team Right Knider won their first match last week. We hope that Dada scores a century and takes the Right Kniders to the semis, that would be our last effort to get some excitement out of the Silent Killer. Although all said and done, he is a good guy yeah! he is a good guy yeah!
Slumdog Millionaire is being remade in Caraniya with the Three Muskeeters: Sexy Eyes, Noorani Chehra and 100 miles. The story of the three musketeers who travel their way from Mumbai to Melbourne in search of some knowledge but Sexy Eyes is jinxed with sore eyes whenever he comes anywhere near knowledge and Noorani Chehra and 100 miles are still trying to drag each other towards the victory line and say JAY HO!!
As I said before, we have people from all walks of life, for example we have Bhai Ji, who is part of the minority community of people who still think Salman acts. How can you expect any kind of acting from that person but then again you cant blame Bhai Ji, he expected to get some gracefull marks in his first task as well but ended up with just GRACE MARKS.
Time is running out and I have to go but before I go, I have a public safety announcement to make. Anytime, you go out at night/morning/noon..watever...if you see a thin figure coming towards you and waving at you, DO NOT and I repeat..DO NOT try and remember if you know him,,,,,,,,BECAUSE..YOU DONT!! Poor guy is suffering from the much famous "HI MAN" syndrome and is observing Eye Rapist to learn how to just look at people without saying a word.
That set for this one guys and girl(S)
P.S. Who Am I?? If you need a name for me, call me.....MR. NOBODY(taken from a poem I read in my english class years back)
So.....First things first, Yes! This is indeed a copy or cheap imitation(if you wanna call it that) of the FAKE IPL PLAYER blog. This is dedicated to our special "home" Caraniya. Where the owner has been able to get people from all walks of life.
This blog is just to have some fun, nothing else!! People who do take this personal should not read any further and basically not follow the blog and people who do get offended AND continue to read...well...........I DONT GIVE A DAMN THEN!! (No but seriously, this is STRICTLY for fun and nothing else, so please see it in the right way)
So, we have one morning staff and one night staff at Caraniya and I am sure our "MBA" students have a thing or two to learn from the owners about hiring, or shall I say "HRM". We have Mitti as our morning staff, who has the most atroscious answers to any and all of our problems, how else do you explain the internet getting slower because "people are using it". What was the purpose of internet again?
Next we have eye rapist as our night staff. She comes, she sees and....she rapes!! I still cannot understand if she does not want to talk or she cannot talk. In either case, her eyes tells the story, like they say "AANKHEIN BHIIIII.......HOTI HAI DIL KI ZABAAN".
So.....lets talk about our family members in Caraniya. By the way, before I start, Let me run a commercial which is sponsored by M.R.P. (Minimum Retail Price). If you are about to go for shopping clothes,groceries,gadgets then hold on to your horses and contact M.R.P., he gets you the best of prices,no matter what price you currently get,M.R.P. WILL BEAT IT! So get on phone and call 1-800-MRP, thats 1-800-MRP or come directly to room "1+23+32+4-45"
So, back to our family...as we all know, we have many Deakin students as well as students from Swinburne. Talking about universities, did any one of you have any idea that getting admission at Deakin is "VERY DIFFICULT" , atleast Air Cooler (A/C) certainly thinks so, and I was living in my own world thinking that we have geniuses from India at Deakin who cannot even work their way around the website of the university, well give them facebook, SURE!! they can find their way around but for the university website, they need to ask the professor 100s of question before "settling in the Australian education system".
While I am on the topic of facebook, GUESS WHOS BACK, BACK AGAIN, BLACKYS BACK, TELL A FRIEND!! GUESS WHO'S BACK, GUESS WHOS BACK, GUESS WHOS BACK.......
Southbank is finaly backk to facebook, so much for all his goodbyes to "everyone". Apparently he is getting back to a lot of things lately and smoking is one of it. We wonder if his time to go back to India is coming soon.
Bakchod baba is surely going back to India soon, I wonder if he would be in time for the selection of IPL 3. We will all miss him for sure. Most of all he would be missed by the Questionnaire. (More about him later)
So, lets talk about others now. The experiment on silent killer flopped as we failed to get him excited even after his team Right Knider won their first match last week. We hope that Dada scores a century and takes the Right Kniders to the semis, that would be our last effort to get some excitement out of the Silent Killer. Although all said and done, he is a good guy yeah! he is a good guy yeah!
Slumdog Millionaire is being remade in Caraniya with the Three Muskeeters: Sexy Eyes, Noorani Chehra and 100 miles. The story of the three musketeers who travel their way from Mumbai to Melbourne in search of some knowledge but Sexy Eyes is jinxed with sore eyes whenever he comes anywhere near knowledge and Noorani Chehra and 100 miles are still trying to drag each other towards the victory line and say JAY HO!!
As I said before, we have people from all walks of life, for example we have Bhai Ji, who is part of the minority community of people who still think Salman acts. How can you expect any kind of acting from that person but then again you cant blame Bhai Ji, he expected to get some gracefull marks in his first task as well but ended up with just GRACE MARKS.
Time is running out and I have to go but before I go, I have a public safety announcement to make. Anytime, you go out at night/morning/noon..watever...if you see a thin figure coming towards you and waving at you, DO NOT and I repeat..DO NOT try and remember if you know him,,,,,,,,BECAUSE..YOU DONT!! Poor guy is suffering from the much famous "HI MAN" syndrome and is observing Eye Rapist to learn how to just look at people without saying a word.
That set for this one guys and girl(S)
P.S. Who Am I?? If you need a name for me, call me.....MR. NOBODY(taken from a poem I read in my english class years back)
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